Jalopnik`s Doug DeMuro on Auto Detailing

The car community is absolutely obsessed with detailing automobiles. The car community lives on detailing automobiles. The car community thrives on the cleanliness of automobiles, to the point where I have been to cars and coffee with people who discuss nothing other than whether or not a car has swirl marks in the paint. “Look at that F430 stick shift!” I would say. “Yeah,” the person would reply. “But look at the swirl marks.”
 
He has a point. I used to spend a lot of time worrying and fretting about spiderweb, swirls, etc to the point where it was just overwhelming. Maybe that`s part of my personality (i.e. getting overly obsessed with activities), but it got to a point where it was just not fun anymore. So what if I have some spider webbing? Why do I need to spend 4-5 hours rubbing and touching an inanimate object whose sole purpose is to get me from one point to another and will definitely get dirty in doing so? I can spend those 4-5 hours with my kiddos, my family, my friends.... I`m not saying I take my vehicles through the auto car washes nowadays, I`m just saying I don`t spend hours of time and hundreds of dollars on it anymore. And in all honesty, my vehicles look better than 90% (ok, I`m ballparking a stat here) of every other one I see. There`s a point of diminishing returns with this stuff. When I`m spending hours more time to get a fraction of a percentage better result, it`s just not worth it. I do enjoy a clean car, but when it`s all said and done, that`s all it is - a car. A way to get back and forth. Now, with that said, I suppose I have to relent to the fact that we`re all different and that some people place an immeasurable amount of affection and worth on these depreciating hunks of metal and plastic, and to them they`re more than just cars. I was there at one time, I`m just not anymore.
 
JaredPointer said:
He has a point. I used to spend a lot of time worrying and fretting about spiderweb, swirls, etc to the point where it was just overwhelming. Maybe that`s part of my personality (i.e. getting overly obsessed with activities), but it got to a point where it was just not fun anymore. So what if I have some spider webbing? Why do I need to spend 4-5 hours rubbing and touching an inanimate object whose sole purpose is to get me from one point to another and will definitely get dirty in doing so? I can spend those 4-5 hours with my kiddos, my family, my friends.... I`m not saying I take my vehicles through the auto car washes nowadays, I`m just saying I don`t spend hours of time and hundreds of dollars on it anymore. And in all honesty, my vehicles look better than 90% (ok, I`m ballparking a stat here) of every other one I see. There`s a point of diminishing returns with this stuff. When I`m spending hours more time to get a fraction of a percentage better result, it`s just not worth it. I do enjoy a clean car, but when it`s all said and done, that`s all it is - a car. A way to get back and forth. Now, with that said, I suppose I have to relent to the fact that we`re all different and that some people place an immeasurable amount of affection and worth on these depreciating hunks of metal and plastic, and to them they`re more than just cars. I was there at one time, I`m just not anymore.
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But what about us with no lives ?!?!?!?!
 
I`ve been following Doug on Jalopnik for a few years and am not at all surprised by his comments. Doug buys a fancy (used) car for exactly one year and writes columns about owning/driving said car.
 
Ronkh said:
But what about us with no lives ?!?!?!?!
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I guess my answer would be something along the lines of doing something with life that has substance. When I`m dead and gone, that car I spent all that time on is going to be in someone else`s hands going thru the auto wash. If I spend that time doing things with and for other people, that leaves a little bit more impact in the world after I`m gone.

I understand you`re joking, but I`m honestly trying to give you an answer that puts into light just how far down "detailing" is on my priority list. No offense intended. If we, as a society, spent a little more time involved with each other as opposed to being so self-immersed in _______________, then we might possibly make our little slice of the universe a better place to be.
 
Now this is a funny quote:

" suddenly the idea of going for a drive strikes me, much like the idea of “scratching yourself” might strike you."

LMAO!!
 
He talks critically about his pal spending "four hours" to wash multiple cars...shudder...I can seldom wash *one* car properly in that time. I pity that Aston Martin, and its next owner.

Even the vehicles I just "use like tools/drive the wheels off `em" are basically marring-free now that I`ve figured out how to wash properly, and mechanics never get their hands dirty on *my* undercarriages or engine compartments (note that the cleanliness allows me to spot little problems before they become serious, *before* it goes in for service, fewer surprises that way). I don`t think I "obsess" over this stuff, I just treat my cars the way I try to treat everything else in my life- properly. I put swirls/etc. in the same category as wrinkled clothing, a unkempt home, or poor diction- namely an indication that something isn`t being done properly.

And keeping my vehicles (my version of) Autopian doesn`t detract from my other interests and activities. I really do believe my line about "Life is not a car show" so I don`t wash a vehicle unless I really consider it "dirty", I reLSP a few times a year at most, and I basically *never* polish. Sorta funny to me- people whose cars need detailed think I spend all my time detailing; people whose dogs don`t behave as mine do think I spend all my time training dogs; people who aren`t in my physical condition think I spend all my time exercising; people who don`t...etc. etc. Yet I spend *hours* doing things that I truly value while still getting all the "chores" (including detailing) done when they need doing.

[Heck] I spend a lot more time posting here than I do detailing!
 
Accumulator said:
He talks critically about his pal spending "four hours" to wash multiple cars...shudder...I can seldom wash *one* car properly in that time. I pity that Aston Martin, and its next owner.

Even the vehicles I just "use like tools/drive the wheels off `em" are basically marring-free now that I`ve figured out how to wash properly, and mechanics never get their hands dirty on *my* undercarriages or engine compartments (note that the cleanliness allows me to spot little problems before they become serious, *before* it goes in for service, fewer surprises that way). I don`t think I "obsess" over this stuff, I just treat my cars the way I try to treat everything else in my life- properly. I put swirls/etc. in the same category as wrinkled clothing, a unkempt home, or poor diction- namely an indication that something isn`t being done properly.

And keeping my vehicles (my version of) Autopian doesn`t detract from my other interests and activities. I really do believe my line about "Life is not a car show" so I don`t wash a vehicle unless I really consider it "dirty", I reLSP a few times a year at most, and I basically *never* polish. Sorta funny to me- people whose cars need detailed think I spend all my time detailing; people whose dogs don`t behave as mine do think I spend all my time training dogs; people who aren`t in my physical condition think I spend all my time exercising; people who don`t...etc. etc. Yet I spend *hours* doing things that I truly value while still getting all the "chores" (including detailing) done when they need doing.

[Heck] I spend a lot more time posting here than I do detailing!
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Well said, Accumulator !
Dan F
 
I was one of those obsessed people the first first 2 years of ownership of my black Camaro. Last year my obsession started to turn back to normal. Bad thing this year I am at the point I don`t even care anymore what it looks like. I think I basically got burned out trying to keep it looking nice the first 2 years. I definitely have the boxes full of products that show for it that will never get used up in my life time. It is funny my last car got a washing maybe twice a month, only time it seen wax was if it added when I was at the touchless. The car was 8 years old when I traded it off for this one and it still look like clean and new outside of the usual fine swirl marks. Funny this car has seen more polish, wax and detail products then most all of my previous vehicles I have owned combined.
 
Bottom line is, I like driving a clean car. As mentioned above, it like wearing clean clothes. I spend 2.1 - 3 hours a wash every 2 to four weeks, depending if it has rained or snowed. It`s not the rain or snow that get her in need of a wash, its the road spray. I like clean, shiny cars and love the random comments I get when I drive. But different strokes for different people.
 
I just need to live above the 90 percent line. I`d say unless one of you guys is around. I`m the best kept ride at any given venue around here with almost no exception. And it`s exhausting !

JaredPointer said:
He has a point. I used to spend a lot of time worrying and fretting about spiderweb, swirls, etc to the point where it was just overwhelming. Maybe that`s part of my personality (i.e. getting overly obsessed with activities), but it got to a point where it was just not fun anymore. So what if I have some spider webbing? Why do I need to spend 4-5 hours rubbing and touching an inanimate object whose sole purpose is to get me from one point to another and will definitely get dirty in doing so? I can spend those 4-5 hours with my kiddos, my family, my friends.... I`m not saying I take my vehicles through the auto car washes nowadays, I`m just saying I don`t spend hours of time and hundreds of dollars on it anymore. And in all honesty, my vehicles look better than 90% (ok, I`m ballparking a stat here) of every other one I see. There`s a point of diminishing returns with this stuff. When I`m spending hours more time to get a fraction of a percentage better result, it`s just not worth it. I do enjoy a clean car, but when it`s all said and done, that`s all it is - a car. A way to get back and forth. Now, with that said, I suppose I have to relent to the fact that we`re all different and that some people place an immeasurable amount of affection and worth on these depreciating hunks of metal and plastic, and to them they`re more than just cars. I was there at one time, I`m just not anymore.
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Different strokes for different folks. Having a family, I don`t have nearly enough time to keep my truck as clean as I would like to, but as one of the previous poster`s said, it`s still probably cleaner than 90% of the vehicles on the road. I just find it very strange how some people will spend a bunch of money on a car and then treat it like crap (The same goes for homes. It blows my mind how so many people let their homes go)
 
I know quite a few people who really let their pricey cars go cosmetically. Some of those folks are having a *BALL* with the Car Hobby nonetheless, so I do try not to be too judgemental about it. The ol` "to each their own" thing...and I remind myself that it`s really none of my business.
 
Even from the middle of Maine, Doug continues to taunt us...

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I agree with the writer, there`s no point in detailing if I`m going to worry about getting my car dirty every time I drive it.

I also don`t drive mine to work or to local stores. I live downtown Montreal and we have the 2nd best public transportation system in North America, but I do get the urge to drive mine daily. It is my only car after all so it is our grocery getter (one of a few stores I drive to and I park way in the back taking two spots).

I`m sure many of you have seen how clean I love to keep my car and how I wash it weekly because I drive it daily.

Here`re some examples of how much I really love to drive my car regardless of how dirty it gets:












Check the ice on the side of my car (it was -30f and the salt water spray froze on the side of the car)


P.S. I came here to learn how to properly clean my car without causing damage because I love to drive/race more than washing cars.
 
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