Car Washing Horror Stories

I have a 2003 Mercedes. I thought that the dealer would know how to care for cars since they are high end. The first few times I had my car in for minor things or oil changes (free), they washed it and left massive scratching, swirling, and webbing. We are currently negotiating the compensation I will receive for this. My car is black, and with as many black cars as they sell, you'd think they would get a clue. The Service Manager said no one can wash cars without leaving swirls. I tried to educate him, but they don't want to invest the time or money to do it right, or even closer to right. I started to take a look at the new cars on the lot and several look like they had a brillo pad taken to them.

I bought a 2006 Ford F-250 Harley-Davidson Crew Cab diesel also in black. When I went to get it the dealer had just washed it and was wiping it down with paper towels from the rest room. So I had it buffed, and the guy (detail guy from another dealership who is supposed to be the "best") used a rotary and left lots of swirls. I've just bought a PC to take care of it myself. I'm in the process of educating myself (and being educated by lots of you) before I start so I don't screw anything up. I'll do my wife's car first since it is in sad shape and can't be hurt too badly.
 
one day, (I was around 10 years old at the time), we got home, with our 92 camry totally soaked from the rain. Then my parents changed the wiper blades as they didnt work well on the way home. I then proceeded to take the old blades and "dried" the car by running it across the paint. The end result was swirls like you couldn't imagine. There wasnt any shine left in that car. Our car was like the crappiest looking one out of the whole neighborhood after that incident. Needless to say, we sold that car in 2002...I was GLAD it was gone as it reminded me everytime I looked at it on how NOT to dry a car...



its not really a car wash horror...but halfway there!



well, heres a story: my aunt just hoses down the car and dries it with a towel...no soap PLUS all the caked on dirt's glory.
 
Good stories. But I gotta tell you about my neighbor. He has all his car wax stuff out readt to do his car. He parks the car in the sun and sez he is heating up the car to wax it. Tried to explain the problem, but he explained this is the way it has been done for 30 years.



He can't figure out why our cars stand out on the block in the middle of winter.
 
Here's my contribution.



Once a pal asked me for advice on how to wash her car properly. I told her briefly...

Wash the wheels 1st, then the car> dry the car before you use your spray wax.



She followed everything i said.



Only one problem.....







She did everything with the same terry cloth!!! :bow :bow :bow :bow :bow :bow :bow
 
Waiting in line to have my oil changed (there was a 30-40 minute wait). Guy next to me in a Camry (5th gen) takes the Armor All Tire shine and sprays the whole wheel rim and all. By now there is a thick layer sliding down the rim. He lets it sit there...I say to him "Man that looks good"...



Me: "Do you detail cars?"

guy: "yes...I do it part time"

guy :"I've been so busy that I did not get a chance to do my car which I'm embarrased about (no sh**)."

"I'm going to do a small pro detail clinic to show you. I normally charge $75 for the clinic" :shocked

guy: gets out a bottle of Sprite gets out and old beach towel. :wow:

guy: "I'm going to show you this trick but don't tell anyone"

he pours Sprite on the towel and wipes his trunk (which was caked with dust and bird droppings). He takes 10 pennies and puts them on the wet trunk.

guy "The pennies form a covalent bond with the Sprite and lift the dirt right off. The trick is to let the product do the work" :shocked



2 minutes pass and then the guy says "Now that the product is working I'm going to hit it with the MM (he said it meant Miracle Mix). "

He brings out this jar filled with something that looks like grease.

guy: "I mixed some jeweler rouje and WD40, then I let it simmer for the night so the WD40 can release it's power, the next day I mix some PLEDGE (he said this was a trick he learned at the Ford dealership he used to work at). The next day I pour in some Clearasil and lime juice with some mayo to get some paint lubrication and some Ajax to DEEPLY clean the paint".



The guy takes the pennies off and applies his Miracle Mix. I'm dying trying no to lough.



I feel like I'm in a movie and can't belive this nutjob.



He pours the Miracle Mix on the trunk and takes out sand paper on a sanding block.

guy: "This here is 1200 grit and what I'm about to show you people would kill for". He sprays some liquid on the trunk which needs no introduction it is Kerosene.

guy: "I wet sand/polish/clean all in one step. It is the same process VW used on their Phaton and Touareg and Audi uses it on the A8 S8. It was developed by their top paint chemist in Wolfsburg Germany" :shocked (It is getting really hard not to laugh but I know I have to keep my cool cause the stroy keeps getting better)



He proceedes to use the sand paper on the Miracle Mix which was sprayed with Kerosene.

He made about 40 passes until the "product" was worked in the paint. The oil guy comes over and tells us that we have another 15-20 minutes to wait. He glances at the trunk and asks the guy what he is doing "Just using some Turtle wax". The oil guy leaves and the Camry guy says "I never tell my secreets to these oil people...they don't know anything about paint protection". By now the trunk is gone....the paint is in BAD shape.



The guy takes a break and says that his product needs to be left to take a breath for maximum effect.



He takes the old beach towel and some shoes polish (I kidd you not). The car is black.



He proceedes to apply the shoe polish with the beach towel pushing hard on it.

By now the paint is getting even worse. I ask him why the paint has swirls, scratches and is dull.



guy: "I have to hit it with my rotary polisher....this took me a long time to learn and it is not for beginners....If you want to do this only do it by hand"...



I ask to see the polisher but he is locking up "Look man I already gave out too much info".



I ask again. He opens the trunk. He is now looking hard at Joe the oil guy who is watching us. By now a few of the oil guys are talking and I can hear them laughing.



guy: "I don't want the oil guys to see my tools. They are laughing because they don't know jack about paint or detailing". The oil guys move on. From the trunk he emerges with what can only be described as a coleman 6" 2000 rpm WalMart special. "This here is my pride and joy, a real pro tool". I nod and turn my face because I'm about to bust out laughing. They are ready for my car now. I get in the car and start laughing hard... :wow: :wow:
 
And to think, all this time I've been using carnaubas and stuff like Klasse when all I had to do to get superior paint protection was mix up all the leftover chemicals in my garage and rub it into the paint!
 
I've been caught, but truth be told it's not store bought mayo, it has to be homemade with osterich eggs. not chicken eggs as they are to acidic. you need a more neutral egg, goose or osterich.



that is the key.
 
Just saw my neighbor's daughter out washing the car. Large blue jug of Purex liquid laundry detergent by the wash bucket :shocked . I offered some car wash for FREE so she wouldn't have to use it. She says "no thanks, I'm almost done" :rolleyes:
 
So I back my car out of my garage one day so I can wash it when I get back home from picking up my mom.



When I come back home there is a group of 5 little kids washing my car ages 5-10 :shocked. My sister had paid the little buggers to wash her car and they washed my car by mistake. They had already finished washing and where going over it with an old bath towel to dry it off.



So im already pretty mad at this point but there wasnt anything I could do about it because they where already done.



So I start looking around to see what type of soap they used and all I could find was a bottle of 409 Kitchen and Bath Cleaner and some tire shine :grrr . Needless to saymy car was still dirty because the could reach the roof and now I need to wax it again :bawling: :waxing:
 
I think you all are being way too hard on the Pledge users. It really works well. Seriously.

Years ago my brother-in-law used to use it on his car. It always came out fantastic.

.

.

.

.

.

I guess I should also explain that his car had a worn finish and he couldn't afford to get it painted. So he painted it himself with interior latex paint. Using a roller. :2thumbs:



It was the most uniquely textured car in town. I wish I had pictures.
 
langod said:
I think you all are being way too hard on the Pledge users. It really works well. Seriously.

Years ago my brother-in-law used to use it on his car. It always came out fantastic.

.

.

.

.

.

I guess I should also explain that his car had a worn finish and he couldn't afford to get it painted. So he painted it himself with interior latex paint. Using a roller. :2thumbs:



It was the most uniquely textured car in town. I wish I had pictures.
Click to expand...



that had to have been the perfect combinations of smileys and words i have seen so far. that was halarious!
 
langod said:
I think you all are being way too hard on the Pledge users. It really works well. Seriously.

Years ago my brother-in-law used to use it on his car. It always came out fantastic.

.

.

.

.

.

I guess I should also explain that his car had a worn finish and he couldn't afford to get it painted. So he painted it himself with interior latex paint. Using a roller. :2thumbs:



It was the most uniquely textured car in town. I wish I had pictures.
Click to expand...



Oh...my...
 
Who doesn't use a roller to paint cars now a days...



BTW



I saw a 944 at maaco today getting a wash with I think a broom.



Solid.
 
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