Accumulator
Well-known member
This thread is the perfect place to mention something I`ve found of critical importance: Self Talk.
No, it`s not just New Agey feel-good Hoo-Ha. It`s dead-serious stuff, and it`s gotta be done right or it can literally kill you (usually after making your life miserable).
The things we say to ourselves program our Subconscious. And the Subconscious never sleeps, never forgets, and it won`t be denied, even if it has to do its work "behind your back" without your knowledge.
I always say that "the Subconscious is like a really smart Beauceron puppy." Because like a smart, powerful, and *fearless* dog, the Subconscious doesn`t process negations, and if it grows up *wrong* it can really get out of control and do damage; but if it`s raised..and that means if it`s TRAINED... *right* it can be your faithful guardian, servant, and companion, greatly enriching your life. When you tell a dog "You are *NOT* a good dog!" it really just hears "You are...a good dog!" The "not" just doesn`t register, not at all. The subconscious is the same way; if you tell yourself "Hey, I`m not stupid!", it records that as "Hey, I....*am*..stupid!" It always believes you, and it never forgets that you told it that..you program yourself for future failure, even if just a tiny little bit (which can add up over time). Maybe it won`t really manifest itself if you`re lucky, but most of the time it finds some way to bubble up and affect your "real life".
So *never* talk to yourself that way. Just say *positive* things, even when you`re [ticked] off at yourself for making some mistake. "I`m a smart guy who`s gonna get this right the next time!" sounds *so* feel-good goofy that some of us have to pretty much force ourselves to think that way, let alone actually *tell ourselves* stuff like that on a conscious level. But it really does make a huge difference. And it gets easier the more often you do it.
A simple change that I found a great starting point was to (literally) laugh at my mistakes, which is sure light-years away from how I was raised and from what seemed natural to me. For ages, whenever I did something wrong I literally stopped whatever I was doing and I forced myself to smile and laugh out loud no matter how minor/major the mistake was (sometimes while running for a bandage
). It was unnatural as all [expletive] for a long time, but eventually it became natural, then it became second-nature, and it has really made a huge difference in my life.
Your Inner Life is *not* Marine boot camp. It has a different purpose and calls for different measures.
There are plenty of other [individuals] in this world who will denigrate you (and the criticism of others, let alone ridiculing them, is a whole `nother topic of great importance when it comes to having a good life). There`s no need to add to that chorus by doing it yourself. All that negative [stuff] is counterproductive in the functional sense. All of it. No good ever comes of it long-term. But not going there isn`t always easy.
No, it`s not just New Agey feel-good Hoo-Ha. It`s dead-serious stuff, and it`s gotta be done right or it can literally kill you (usually after making your life miserable).
The things we say to ourselves program our Subconscious. And the Subconscious never sleeps, never forgets, and it won`t be denied, even if it has to do its work "behind your back" without your knowledge.
I always say that "the Subconscious is like a really smart Beauceron puppy." Because like a smart, powerful, and *fearless* dog, the Subconscious doesn`t process negations, and if it grows up *wrong* it can really get out of control and do damage; but if it`s raised..and that means if it`s TRAINED... *right* it can be your faithful guardian, servant, and companion, greatly enriching your life. When you tell a dog "You are *NOT* a good dog!" it really just hears "You are...a good dog!" The "not" just doesn`t register, not at all. The subconscious is the same way; if you tell yourself "Hey, I`m not stupid!", it records that as "Hey, I....*am*..stupid!" It always believes you, and it never forgets that you told it that..you program yourself for future failure, even if just a tiny little bit (which can add up over time). Maybe it won`t really manifest itself if you`re lucky, but most of the time it finds some way to bubble up and affect your "real life".
So *never* talk to yourself that way. Just say *positive* things, even when you`re [ticked] off at yourself for making some mistake. "I`m a smart guy who`s gonna get this right the next time!" sounds *so* feel-good goofy that some of us have to pretty much force ourselves to think that way, let alone actually *tell ourselves* stuff like that on a conscious level. But it really does make a huge difference. And it gets easier the more often you do it.
A simple change that I found a great starting point was to (literally) laugh at my mistakes, which is sure light-years away from how I was raised and from what seemed natural to me. For ages, whenever I did something wrong I literally stopped whatever I was doing and I forced myself to smile and laugh out loud no matter how minor/major the mistake was (sometimes while running for a bandage

Your Inner Life is *not* Marine boot camp. It has a different purpose and calls for different measures.
There are plenty of other [individuals] in this world who will denigrate you (and the criticism of others, let alone ridiculing them, is a whole `nother topic of great importance when it comes to having a good life). There`s no need to add to that chorus by doing it yourself. All that negative [stuff] is counterproductive in the functional sense. All of it. No good ever comes of it long-term. But not going there isn`t always easy.