keeotee
Detailing Stare
Got the following yesterday for my birthday from my niece and I thought it was pretty cute and would share:
_________________________________________________
Are You a Detailing Addict?
Hello.
Yes, you. You, looking at this screen for hours on end searching for products. You, bleary eyed. You, an addict. Have you looked in the mirror lately? Been outside? Know what day of the week it is?
Your name was given to us by a spouse or family member who is concerned about your detailing addiction. At Detailaholics Anonymous, we can help. We're a non-profit society of recovering addicts like yourself that provides support and counseling through weekly meetings designed to help you cope with your problem.
We feature a twelve step recovery program and in extreme cases, interventions. Although it is our firm belief that you are never "cured," you most certainly can recover.
We have designed a brief checklist to determine if you are an addict.
Do you:
1) Have twitches of the hand when you walk by products you don’t own?
2) Check e-mail more than five times a day to see if you’ve received a newsletter about new & better products YOU MUST TRY?
3) Spend more time buffing than eating or sleeping?
4) Wax aimlessly with no direction, if only to have more products?
5) Leave your name and information at countless sites if only to hope you'll receive a reply one day from another person as crazy as you are?
6) Start detailing before important personal habits, such as meal
preparation, hygiene or bodily functions?
7) Have red, swollen eyes that hang halfway out of your head from waking up so early because of the overwhelming excitement?
8) Spend hours detailing on a holiday, when you'd usually be griping about...everything?
9) Send pictures of your work to EVERYONE with an e-mail address as well as posting them on countless websites?
10) All of the above?
If you answered yes to four or more questions (or chose #10), you have a problem. Please call us at Detailaholics Anonymous at: 1-800-WAXBEGONE.
We're here, we're free, and we're confidential. The first step to
recovery is admission that you have a problem.
Call us today.
If you can put down the buffers and towels, that is.
_________________________________________________
Are You a Detailing Addict?
Hello.
Yes, you. You, looking at this screen for hours on end searching for products. You, bleary eyed. You, an addict. Have you looked in the mirror lately? Been outside? Know what day of the week it is?
Your name was given to us by a spouse or family member who is concerned about your detailing addiction. At Detailaholics Anonymous, we can help. We're a non-profit society of recovering addicts like yourself that provides support and counseling through weekly meetings designed to help you cope with your problem.
We feature a twelve step recovery program and in extreme cases, interventions. Although it is our firm belief that you are never "cured," you most certainly can recover.
We have designed a brief checklist to determine if you are an addict.
Do you:
1) Have twitches of the hand when you walk by products you don’t own?
2) Check e-mail more than five times a day to see if you’ve received a newsletter about new & better products YOU MUST TRY?
3) Spend more time buffing than eating or sleeping?
4) Wax aimlessly with no direction, if only to have more products?
5) Leave your name and information at countless sites if only to hope you'll receive a reply one day from another person as crazy as you are?
6) Start detailing before important personal habits, such as meal
preparation, hygiene or bodily functions?
7) Have red, swollen eyes that hang halfway out of your head from waking up so early because of the overwhelming excitement?
8) Spend hours detailing on a holiday, when you'd usually be griping about...everything?
9) Send pictures of your work to EVERYONE with an e-mail address as well as posting them on countless websites?
10) All of the above?
If you answered yes to four or more questions (or chose #10), you have a problem. Please call us at Detailaholics Anonymous at: 1-800-WAXBEGONE.
We're here, we're free, and we're confidential. The first step to
recovery is admission that you have a problem.
Call us today.
If you can put down the buffers and towels, that is.
