what do i need on my new webpage

[golden1]

Home - Golden Touch Detailing

[Orinda Auto Detail]

" We apply a high grade polymer paint sealant to your vehicle`s finish. Then we polish to insure no swirl marks. Polymer paint sealers bond with your vehicle`s finish at a molecular level."
That reads strange to me but I don`t think a customer would notice. Other than that it`s very long winded reading your service page. From a consumer stand point I would never read all of that I would look at the price and thats about it. Another thing I saw on the right side was on your hours m-f 8a-5pm," 7am to sat?" confused by this part. might want to put a dedicated page to before/afters.

Just my 2 cents hope it helps!

[RZJZA80]

Shouldn`t it read, we polish the paint THEN apply a paint sealant?

[Addicted2Bling]

When I open up your page the first thing I noticed was clutter. The background is a little distracting from the message you are trying to put out, and take out all those logos you have. It looks like you are trying to get a job at Meguiars or something, they don`t need to see that. I would take out more time and simplify your page, because someone who doesn`t have the patience is not going to read it.

[golden1]

thanks guys, i put it here first to get some feed back i will shorten it up and remove some clutter.
done now. is that better

[The Driver]

Clean cut is the best way,

feel free to check my site out for ideas.

Detailers Workshop

[polisher]

lots of pics tooo!!!

[Reality33]

I could not get through your services page. It is very hard to read and feels like it all runs together.

you may want to look into widening the text field and then breaking the services into sections.

Here is my services page for some ideas. Services

[Troy@Protekt]

I would do a youtube video showing off your work. Start it by introducing yourself and then maybe some before and afters and a little demonstration of what you can do.

I used to have one on my other site. It wasn`t the greatest video but it did show off my paint correcting ability which people were impressed with. Youtube banned it because of the song I chose but here`s another one that I did for youtube....

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oa-Ub7CzHZM"]Armstrong Detailing vs Volvo S70[/ame]

The one I had on my site was better because it was a crapped out black suburban that I did paint correction on and it turned out practically perfect.

I was going to do one for my present site but I`m pretty happy with how much business I have so I stopped working on my site. Might even take it down.

If I were trying to grow my business though, I would definitely do one and have it on my home page. I would even have a short clip for each service I provided on the their respective pages. No better way to make a customer feel at ease choosing you, than to use a video so they can see who you are and see what you can do.

Before and after pics are good but aren`t as impressive as a good video of before and after.

[Troy@Protekt]

An added bonus with doing the video is it is free advertising on youtube and will help with getting your site ranked higher when people do searches.

[Bunky]

My initial reaction was it could use a lot of write up improvements: capitalizing formal names, rewrite some sentences/phrases to make more concise, use bullets for lists, add more white space between paragraphs, use headings.

This is more apparent on the services page where there are different type font and size (serif and sans serif for body). There is too much text and not enough white space between paragraphs. I would suggest keeping the lists of tasks for services to a minimum if they are being asked to choose between services.

It may be better to just have a section on what makes you better than your competition in a separate such as "Why choose my service" such as safer washing / drying methods, experience, special services others do not offerred by competition, etc. rather than trying to bury these in the service descriptions.