help my flier

**drock** · 07-19-2005, 02:55 PM

this is what i have for my flier so far. Any suggestions would help espcially with the back part. should i include prices? this will be more of a summer/weekend gig.

****edit

pics has been taken down since i wasn`t suppose to post them because of the contact info on there i will make the changes and place them back up

**rollman** · 07-19-2005, 04:12 PM

They look good to me , are these postcard size mailers ? Do you plan on mailing them ? No Phone number ? As for prices that`s up to you , I would leave them out hoping that people truely interested in your service will contact you . Some people might disagree with this thinking .

**imported_themightytimmah** · 07-19-2005, 04:15 PM

Did you spell check swirl removal?

Other than that, looks good, I`ve been thinking of making a similar flier to place on trashed cars.

**chrisx** · 07-19-2005, 04:47 PM

I agree with Rollman, add a phone number as some people would prefer to talk and get an instant response rather than email. Also agree with leaving prices off.

**BookemDano** · 07-19-2005, 05:34 PM

Hi,

First, add a phone number. Better yet, get a phone number specific to your business and make sure it has voice mail.

Second, here are some suggestions about text formatting and syntax:

- Ensure that all text is in the present tense. For example, instead of "...will provide..." use "...provides...". Instead of "...will be treated...", use "...is treated...".

- The centered text on the second page looks good, but lose the dashes ("-") at the beginning. They are not necessary and not consistent.

- Add the phone number to the contact. I.e., "Please call use at ... or e-mail us at...".

- I very much like the raised "buttons" on the second page. VERY nice! But... The buttons on the first page are a bit clunky. Change the two buttons on the first page to be the same as the ones on the second page.

- On the first page, instead of "Each vehicle is treated..." consider "Your vehicle is treated...". (I`m not sure about this one.)

After you make your changes, reread each line, and then each phrase and then each word several times. Ask yourself, "Can I make this more concise? Can I leave out more words?" and "Are there better, more impactful words to use?". I find that, even after the eighth or tenth reading, I can make subtle changes that improve the content.

Other than that, it looks great!

Regards,

Dan.

**AutoNova** · 07-19-2005, 06:21 PM

What program did you use to create that, I like it! You know it is going to be really pricey to run copies of that or get cards made.

Are you including pricing?

**Terran** · 07-19-2005, 06:43 PM

Platinum not platium

Also, "We use top quality products to make your car look beautiful..."

**drock** · 07-19-2005, 10:39 PM

thanks for all the tips and corrections. i guess thats what happens when i put a flier together in the middle of the night. rollman, yes they will be postcards size where i can pass out. Autonova, i used adobe photoshop to put toget the flier.

**FrizzleFry** · 07-19-2005, 10:59 PM

Originally Posted by AutoNova

What program did you use to create that, I like it! You know it is going to be really pricey to run copies of that or get cards made.

Are you including pricing?

Postcards can be made relatively inexpensively. I get postcards for promo events made at 5000 cards for $300. Local shop here. 1000 I think is $100. So 6 cents to 10 cents/card. Not too bad I think. If for every 100 cards you get one to bite. That $100 just made you $1000 (of course depends how much you charge)

Good job on the card. I`m working on one myself. good luck.

**rollman** · 07-20-2005, 12:10 PM

www.overnightprints.com they do postcards for a very reasonable price.

**Flexin** · 07-20-2005, 02:04 PM

Originally Posted by Rollman

www.overnightprints.com they do postcards for a very reasonable price.

Thats who does our business cards. Everybody loves our cards. We are thinking of getting postcards made up soon.

James

**kompressornsc** · 07-20-2005, 02:58 PM

Originally Posted by BookemDano

Hi,

First, add a phone number. Better yet, get a phone number specific to your business and make sure it has voice mail.

Second, here are some suggestions about text formatting and syntax:

- Ensure that all text is in the present tense. For example, instead of "...will provide..." use "...provides...". Instead of "...will be treated...", use "...is treated...".

- The centered text on the second page looks good, but lose the dashes ("-") at the beginning. They are not necessary and not consistent.

- Add the phone number to the contact. I.e., "Please call use at ... or e-mail us at...".

- I very much like the raised "buttons" on the second page. VERY nice! But... The buttons on the first page are a bit clunky. Change the two buttons on the first page to be the same as the ones on the second page.

- On the first page, instead of "Each vehicle is treated..." consider "Your vehicle is treated...". (I`m not sure about this one.)

After you make your changes, reread each line, and then each phrase and then each word several times. Ask yourself, "Can I make this more concise? Can I leave out more words?" and "Are there better, more impactful words to use?". I find that, even after the eighth or tenth reading, I can make subtle changes that improve the content.

Other than that, it looks great!

Regards,

Dan.

Dan`s a copywriter I bet.

My gf (a professional writer) takes everything I write and makes the exact same suggestions. It is amazing what a difference a pro can make in the impact of a piece. Being in marketing myself, I thought I had a good handle on it - not even close! I would never do any print promotion now without having a professional go over it (and it`s a free service for me now :woohoo: ). If you don`t want to spend the $$ to hire a professional writer, trade out services or find a friend that`s a pro-it can and will help immensly.

**BookemDano** · 07-21-2005, 04:00 PM

Originally Posted by kompressornsc

Dan`s a copywriter I bet.

My gf (a professional writer) takes everything I write and makes the exact same suggestions. It is amazing what a difference a pro can make in the impact of a piece. Being in marketing myself, I thought I had a good handle on it - not even close! I would never do any print promotion now without having a professional go over it (and it`s a free service for me now :woohoo: ). If you don`t want to spend the $$ to hire a professional writer, trade out services or find a friend that`s a pro-it can and will help immensly.

Copywriter?!? Not even close! :shocked I`m a software developer. But, I`ve done a lot of writing and had a lot of help in my writing.

I think most of it is just another set of eyes from someone who is a bit anal retentive. (Anal Retentive! On this forum! Wow, never would`ve thought!)

Regards,

Dan.