Friends who want to ride along.

xmx250 · 04-06-07, 06:46

Alright i have a little dillema. Me and my friends "drive around" alot. Like on a weekend we'll cruise all over the place passing by different hang out spots. We rarely just go to one place and stay there all night. We usually end up cruising around all night. Now no one ever really wants to drive their car. Everyone wants to be the passenger, probably because you have more fun,not burning gas,not putting miles on YOUR car.

I feel like personally out of myself and my two other friends i tend to drive the most. This doesnt bother because i tend to drive alot. It just bothers me when my friends show lack of interest to go out when i dont want to drive. For example i took my car out last night witch was a mid week day. but now on friday i state that i dont feel like driving and all of sudden i dont see anyone wanting to go out..................... Its like everyone always wants to be a passenger and if they have to take their car they all of sudden dont want to go anywhere.......... Everytime i speak to one of my friends on the phone they say "call me if you want to do anything" that basically means if i call them up to chill it automatically means i'm picking them up, therefore i'm the driver all night. This pisses me off and it makes me wanna go find somehting to do by myself. But then if i go out without them i'm gonna look shady..........

Basically it comes down to this. My boys are always willing to drive around with me. Everyone says
"call me up". They purposefully dont make the plans that way they dont have to drive. I'm annoyed by it and i'm ready to start heading out by myself. But i need a way to put it to them that if they are not gonna drive their cars i'm gonna go out without them. I hate when people always want to ride along. I believe in sharing duties. I drive one night you drive the next. anyway i'm just venting what do you guys think of the situation?

JDookie · 04-06-07, 06:57

Wow, I remember those days. Well, bud, all I can suggest is tell them that either you guys take turns or nobody goes, and stay home one weekend unless one of them picks up the keys. Either stand up to them, or forever hold your peace, lol.

xmx250 · 04-06-07, 07:04

Yeah i'm 20 and in college so we tend to ride around alot on weekends. Different spots/bars/clubs sometimes. Meet up with different people, pass by different places to see if anything good is going on.

You know what the worst part is. Its one friend in particular that "never wants to drive". Its him that i want to stop picking up. He always says "call me up", but he will never call you................ The reason behind this is because he wants you to pick him up. My other friend is actually pretty willing to drive whenever i dont want to. I actually want to start picking up the friend that is willing to drive and leave without Mr."call me up". but this is gonna leave me looking like a d*ck................ I guess i'm just gonna break it to them that i'm no longer gonna be the driver and if they dont drive i'm gonna go without them.........

JDookie · 04-06-07, 07:30

That's why I suggested staying home unless he picks *you* up. This way, you aren't lying. You honestly don't feel like driving, so you stayed home. If you just go out without him, it will be a hard sell to blame it on not wanting to drive. He may interpret it as you just not wanting to go with him.

A lot of friendships, and even relationships for that matter, are ruined due to a lack of communication. Talk to him and tell him what you are thinking, and if nothing else, at least make everyone chip in for gas.

J.J. · 04-06-07, 07:52

Souns like you need to tell them instead of us. I understand the need to vent though.

IMO, after they've been warned, you no longer look like a **** if you decide to change plans. That's what a warning is for. It informs other parties what your feeling and what you plan to do about it if things don't change.

paradigm · 04-06-07, 07:56

yup...they're your buddies...not a girl you have to kiss up to and impress.

man-up and be honest...just say you want to split the driving duties a bit more.

xmx250 · 04-06-07, 09:02

Quick update. I just called Mr."call ME up" and told him "you wanna chill tonight". he says yea. I say i dont feel like driving so you drive tonight alright........... he says ummm aight i'll call you in abiut half an hour when i'm ready. 20 minutes later he calls me up and says he doesnt want o go anywhere because he has something to do, LOL. I say "what do you have to do" he says "ahh somehting something".

Believe me i know this guy very well and if i asked him what came up its normal that he would say what it is, so him not saying is a strange thing. So in the end i squeezed it out of him in a sublte way and proved to myself that he's a lazy ***. So i'm going to chill with my other boy without him, i wont call him up any more after this...............(at least not to do our usual cruising around). if he calls tommorow and says you wanna chill i'm once again gonna say, yeah, if YOU drive. I no longer feel guilty doing that after what he pulled tonight.

metload1 · 04-07-07, 01:48

I'm on the opposite end of the boat. I've got a friend who doesn't care at all about gas and drives me around all over the place. He usually offers too. I offer to drive sometimes but he really doesn't care. It's weird for me because I'm always worried about gas, I don't know how he isn't. Oh well. Yeah I can see why it would suck to be in your position, especially with gas going up to $3.00 a gallon again.

kompressornsc · 04-07-07, 04:51

In my 'younger days', we use to cruise a lot. The main street in town was solid teenagers every friday and saturday night. Two hours to go four or five blocks. I always wanted to drive. Why? Control!! See someone you want to go talk to? You're in control. Want to go home? You decide. I'm still the same way-I'd rather drive than ride becasue that way I control what happens when.

Kriminal · 04-07-07, 12:28

Quote:

Originally Posted by xmx250

Quick update. I just called Mr."call ME up" and told him "you wanna chill tonight". he says yea. I say i dont feel like driving so you drive tonight alright........... he says ummm aight i'll call you in abiut half an hour when i'm ready. 20 minutes later he calls me up and says he doesnt want o go anywhere because he has something to do, LOL. I say "what do you have to do" he says "ahh somehting something".

Believe me i know this guy very well and if i asked him what came up its normal that he would say what it is, so him not saying is a strange thing. So in the end i squeezed it out of him in a sublte way and proved to myself that he's a lazy ***. So i'm going to chill with my other boy without him, i wont call him up any more after this...............(at least not to do our usual cruising around). if he calls tommorow and says you wanna chill i'm once again gonna say, yeah, if YOU drive. I no longer feel guilty doing that after what he pulled tonight.

Amen ! Glad to hear you actually wear the pants bud.

I went through all this a good 10 years plus ago. It so p!ssed me off back then too. Eventualy I just went my own way and found other FRIENDS, instead off arseholes who think I'm a taxi service

If He was your friend, he'll share the duties......ditch him !

Kriminal · 04-07-07, 12:31

Quote:

Originally Posted by metload1

I'm on the opposite end of the boat. I've got a friend who doesn't care at all about gas and drives me around all over the place. He usually offers too. I offer to drive sometimes but he really doesn't care. It's weird for me because I'm always worried about gas, I don't know how he isn't. Oh well. Yeah I can see why it would suck to be in your position, especially with gas going up to $3.00 a gallon again.

Oh yeah, nearly forgot ya. I know it's none off my business, but you did post it on here - maybe you already do, but you could give him some money towards gas....He's your friend after all, and life's too short

xmx250 · 04-07-07, 05:16

Thanks for the comments guys.

Belive it or not its not even the gas alone why there is this problem with my friends taking taking their cars. I think its cause no one wants wear and tear in their car, racking miles, two passengers, in and out, driving all night....................... Plus its more fun being a passenger cause you can just chill instead of driving.