For those of you who are parents.....

a.k.a. Patrick · 06-02-05, 08:53

This has been in hiding for some time on my computer. I brought it back up, not sure of what it was, and after re-reading it, I decided to share with all of those who are parents or are soon to be parents.......

Is there a magic cutoff period when
offspring become accountable for their own
actions? Is there a wonderful moment when
parents can become detached spectators in
the lives of their children and shrug, "It's
their life," and feel nothing?

When I was in my twenties, I stood in a hospital
corridor waiting for doctors to put a few
stitches in my son's head. I asked, "When do
you stop worrying?" The nurse said,
"When they get out of the accident stage." My
mother just smiled faintly and said nothing.

When I was in my thirties, I sat on a little
chair in a class-room and heard how one of my
children talked incessantly, disrupted the class,
and was headed for a career making
license plates. As if to read my mind, a teacher
said, "Don't worry, they all go through
this stage and then you can sit back, relax and
enjoy them." My mother just smiled
faintly and said nothing.

When I was in my forties, I spent a lifetime
waiting for the phone to ring, the cars to come
home, the front door to open. A friend said,
"They're trying to find themselves. Don't
worry, in a few years, you can stop worrying.
They'll be adults." My mother just smiled
faintly and said nothing.

By the time I was 50, I was sick &tired of being
vulnerable. I was still worrying over my
children, but there was a new wrinkle there
was nothing I could do about it. My
mother just smiled faintly and said nothing. I
continued to anguish over their failures, be
tormented by their frustrations and absorbed in
their disappointments.

My friends said that when my kids got married I
could stop worrying and lead my own
life. I wanted to believe that, but I was
haunted by my mother's warm smile and her
occasional, "You look pale. Are you all right?
Call me the minute you get home. Are
you depressed about something?"

Can it be that parents are sentenced to a
lifetime of worry? Is concern for one another
handed down like a torch to blaze the trail of
human frailties and the fears of the
unknown? Is concern a curse or is it a virtue
that elevates us to the highest form of life?

One of my children became quite irritable
recently, saying to me, "Where were you? I've
been calling for 3 days, and no one answered.
I was worried." I smiled a warm smile.
The torch has been passed.

PASS IT ON TO OTHER PARENTS
(and also to your children. That's the fun part.)

SpoiledMan · 06-02-05, 08:58

That's a classic and I will be SURE to pass it on! Thanks for sharing that Patrick.

III · 06-02-05, 11:57

Mr. Clean · 06-02-05, 12:45

Truer words..........

Ironically, I just came across this today in June's Silver Scoop (senior's publication by the City of Garland). I don't have an author to attribute it to:

After creating Heaven and Earth, God created Adam and Eve and the first thing He said was "Don't"
"Don't what?" replied Adam.
"Don't eat the forbidden fruit: said God.
"Forbidden fruit? Hey Eve, we have forbidden fruit!"
"No way!"
"Yes way!"
"Do NOT eat the fruit" said God.
"Why?"
"Because I am your Father and I said so" said God wondering why he did not stop after creating elephants.
A few minutes later, God saw his children having an apple and he was ticked. "Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?"
"Uh huh" replied Adam.
"Then why did you?" asked God.
"She started it" said Adam.
"Did not!"
"Did to!"
Having had it with the two of them. God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own.

Beercan31 · 06-02-05, 01:22

Mr. Clean

And now you know why animals eat there young.

Sullybob · 06-02-05, 05:20

Thanks Patrick that is a classic. I will send this on.

percynjpn · 06-03-05, 03:35

My son is one now, and the world revolves around him; I know that worrying about his safety and happiness will be priority NO. 1 for many years to come. But that's just fine; I can't think of anything else in the world that I'd rather worry about more! Thanks for the insight!

a.k.a. Patrick · 06-03-05, 06:35

I wouldnt trade those worries for anything. Although they wear at ones nerves, its the unconditional love that makes it all worth while.......

Lowejackson · 06-03-05, 10:02

Great stuff

The smiling bit can be the hardest part

percynjpn · 06-05-05, 04:43

Quote:

Originally posted by a.k.a. Patrick
I wouldnt trade those worries for anything. Although they wear at ones nerves, its the unconditional love that makes it all worth while.......

Yes, of course!! And I know a good Papa when I see one!!