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		<title>Autopia.org - Hot Tub</title>
		<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum</link>
		<description>Off-topic discussions.</description>
		<language>en</language>
		<lastBuildDate>Sat, 21 Nov 2009 03:53:11 GMT</lastBuildDate>
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		<ttl>60</ttl>
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			<url>http://www.autopia.org/forum/autopia_style/misc/rss.jpg</url>
			<title>Autopia.org - Hot Tub</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum</link>
		</image>
		<item>
			<title>Amazing version of a song everyone knows</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125419-amazing-version-song-everyone-knows.html</link>
			<pubDate>Sat, 21 Nov 2009 03:14:29 GMT</pubDate>
			<description>...or should know. 

YouTube - Frank Zappa - Stairway to heaven - 1988 Lund (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qs-MJMZ-G4)</description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>...or should know. <br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qs-MJMZ-G4" target="_blank">YouTube - Frank Zappa - Stairway to heaven - 1988 Lund</a></div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>Scottwax</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125419-amazing-version-song-everyone-knows.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>Super Dave Osborne</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125386-super-dave-osborne.html</link>
			<pubDate>Thu, 19 Nov 2009 19:43:14 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Anyone ever watch him?  I used to love the guy and saw he's making a come back on Spike TV.  I watch the first show the other night.  He's pretty funny still as Super Dave.  I was watching some old SD stuff on youtube and found this.  For some reason I can't stop laughing at it.
YouTube - 9 to 5: Super Dave Osborne does Dolly Parton on BIZARRE Part 1 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xrVnpKelHY)

I watch a lot of Curb Your Enthusiasm and Bob Einstein (Super Dave) is always on there.  He's a pretty funny guy.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>Anyone ever watch him?  I used to love the guy and saw he's making a come back on Spike TV.  I watch the first show the other night.  He's pretty funny still as Super Dave.  I was watching some old SD stuff on youtube and found this.  For some reason I can't stop laughing at it.<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xrVnpKelHY" target="_blank">YouTube - 9 to 5: Super Dave Osborne does Dolly Parton on BIZARRE Part 1</a><br />
<br />
I watch a lot of Curb Your Enthusiasm and Bob Einstein (Super Dave) is always on there.  He's a pretty funny guy.</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>Danase</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125386-super-dave-osborne.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>Avoid SJdiscounttools.com!</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125382-avoid-sjdiscounttools-com.html</link>
			<pubDate>Thu, 19 Nov 2009 17:49:01 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[This place is awful!
I placed an order by phone on November 17, asked about express shipping because i needed it within a week, the lady on the other end sounded pleasant enough and told me they didn't offer express shipping but product was shipping from Ohio and was in stock so it would go out on the 18th (their website also said the item was in stock) I placed my order and waited till the 19th to get a shipping confirmation-nothing, also no charge to my account so I sent this email:

---Quote---
Hello,
could you please tell me what the status of my order is?
I placed it over the phone on Tuesday and they said it would ship out Wednesday, I have not yet received a charge on my account or any shipping information.
Normally I wouldn't be so concerned about it but I start a my new job on Monday and I'm gonna need this tool.
Thank you,
David
---End Quote---
I shortly received this reply:

---Quote---
We are sorry, but this is currently on backorder with an ETA of the beginning of December. We are hoping to get your order in sooner and will update you with any new information. We apologize for any inconvenience this has caused.

Sincerely,

Megan
---End Quote---
***! I'm going to tell my credit union to stop payment on this transaction! Terrible!]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>This place is awful!<br />
I placed an order by phone on November 17, asked about express shipping because i needed it within a week, the lady on the other end sounded pleasant enough and told me they didn't offer express shipping but product was shipping from Ohio and was in stock so it would go out on the 18th (their website also said the item was in stock) I placed my order and waited till the 19th to get a shipping confirmation-nothing, also no charge to my account so I sent this email:<br />
<div style="margin:20px; margin-top:5px; ">
	<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px">Quote:</div>
	<table cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" border="0" width="100%">
	<tr>
		<td class="alt2">
			<hr />
			
				Hello,<br />
could you please tell me what the status of my order is?<br />
I placed it over the phone on Tuesday and they said it would ship out Wednesday, I have not yet received a charge on my account or any shipping information.<br />
Normally I wouldn't be so concerned about it but I start a my new job on Monday and I'm gonna need this tool.<br />
Thank you,<br />
David
			
			<hr />
		</td>
	</tr>
	</table>
</div>I shortly received this reply:<br />
<div style="margin:20px; margin-top:5px; ">
	<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px">Quote:</div>
	<table cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" border="0" width="100%">
	<tr>
		<td class="alt2">
			<hr />
			
				We are sorry, but this is currently on backorder with an ETA of the beginning of December. We are hoping to get your order in sooner and will update you with any new information. We apologize for any inconvenience this has caused.<br />
<br />
Sincerely,<br />
<br />
Megan
			
			<hr />
		</td>
	</tr>
	</table>
</div>***! I'm going to tell my credit union to stop payment on this transaction! Terrible!</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>gofastman</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125382-avoid-sjdiscounttools-com.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>Best commercial ever!</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125362-best-commercial-ever.html</link>
			<pubDate>Thu, 19 Nov 2009 01:14:26 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[I think this commercial will really strike a chord with everyone here:

Watch "Death and Taxes TV Commercial" Video at HagertyLIVE (http://video.hagerty.com/video/Death-and-Taxes-TV-Commercial-2)

Plus the tune is catchy! :chuckle:]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>I think this commercial will really strike a chord with everyone here:<br />
<br />
<a href="http://video.hagerty.com/video/Death-and-Taxes-TV-Commercial-2" target="_blank">Watch &quot;Death and Taxes TV Commercial&quot; Video at HagertyLIVE</a><br />
<br />
Plus the tune is catchy! :chuckle:</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>Mikeyc</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125362-best-commercial-ever.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>What are you getting your GF/wife for Xmas?</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125338-what-you-getting-your-gf-wife-xmas.html</link>
			<pubDate>Wed, 18 Nov 2009 09:25:14 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[What are you guy's plans to get the GF or wife for Xmas? Tryin to get some more ideas... 

So far I'm thinkin, Wii, sowing machine, digital camera, kitchen aid mixer, GPS, a electric keyboard and of course jewlery and clothes. These are all things she wanted, but maybe you guys got some more creative ideas?]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>What are you guy's plans to get the GF or wife for Xmas? Tryin to get some more ideas... <br />
<br />
So far I'm thinkin, Wii, sowing machine, digital camera, kitchen aid mixer, GPS, a electric keyboard and of course jewlery and clothes. These are all things she wanted, but maybe you guys got some more creative ideas?</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>ThatGuySkye</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125338-what-you-getting-your-gf-wife-xmas.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>Bullrun season 3</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125310-bullrun-season-3-a.html</link>
			<pubDate>Tue, 17 Nov 2009 18:16:50 GMT</pubDate>
			<description>Bullrun Season 3 Casting Videos | Bullrun: Rallying the World (http://www.bullrun.com/node/3353)

Here are the selected teams for Bullrun 3. The viper and the NSX look fierce, and that challenger has some potential if daddy actually knows where the gas pedal is.:woohoo:</description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div><a href="http://www.bullrun.com/node/3353" target="_blank">Bullrun Season 3 Casting Videos | Bullrun: Rallying the World</a><br />
<br />
Here are the selected teams for Bullrun 3. The viper and the NSX look fierce, and that challenger has some potential if daddy actually knows where the gas pedal is.:woohoo:</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>tssdetailing</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125310-bullrun-season-3-a.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title><![CDATA[Can't post new thread???]]></title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125271-can-t-post-new-thread.html</link>
			<pubDate>Mon, 16 Nov 2009 15:21:41 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[I'm trying to post a new Pro Detail thread but it's not working??? I've had this happen once before and had to wait until the next day before it would work...It just goes to a blank white screen.


Rasky]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>I'm trying to post a new Pro Detail thread but it's not working??? I've had this happen once before and had to wait until the next day before it would work...It just goes to a blank white screen.<br />
<br />
<br />
Rasky</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>RaskyR1</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125271-can-t-post-new-thread.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>What happened to the old Autopia?</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125243-what-happened-old-autopia.html</link>
			<pubDate>Sun, 15 Nov 2009 16:10:32 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Well its been probably 3 years now since i've really been on this forum, so long I forgot my old screen name.  Anyway now that i'm back on here and tryin to get back into detailing, I find it kinda disappointing.  Maybe its been so long I forgot what it was really like and I just kept all my good memories?  Seemed like there was a lot more activity then and a lot more good information.  It just seemed different.  This was right before and right after it got switched over to this new set up...  I know there are still a few of you out there that have been here 3+ years...  what do you guys think?

-Skye]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>Well its been probably 3 years now since i've really been on this forum, so long I forgot my old screen name.  Anyway now that i'm back on here and tryin to get back into detailing, I find it kinda disappointing.  Maybe its been so long I forgot what it was really like and I just kept all my good memories?  Seemed like there was a lot more activity then and a lot more good information.  It just seemed different.  This was right before and right after it got switched over to this new set up...  I know there are still a few of you out there that have been here 3+ years...  what do you guys think?<br />
<br />
-Skye</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>ThatGuySkye</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125243-what-happened-old-autopia.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>Met some forum guys at SEMA...</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125168-met-some-forum-guys-sema.html</link>
			<pubDate>Thu, 12 Nov 2009 02:05:36 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Worked SEMA all week in the Ford booth with the Meguiar's guys.
As usual, Ford was going OFF all week and it was crazy in there!

Anyway, I met a few forum guys while I was there, which is always a great thing to do.  
So much better to chat cars and polishing in person whenever possible.

I met:

*Todd Helme* aka *TH0001*-  Felt like I was seeing an old friend, very nice guy.  A lot of undeserved hype clouds Todd's persona.

*Jack from Proper Auto Care*- A man with a LOT of knowledge, and history in the car wax business.

*Greg Nichols of Reflections Detailing of Utah*-  Super nice guy, very down to Earth.  Obviously knowledge-packed!

*Robert Whyte* aka *WhyteWizard*- A very friendly guy, struck up a conversation with me in the Ford booth. Chatter, chatter, chatter!!  He has a passion for this stuff.   Stopped by to see him while he manned the HiLustre booth.  We obviously see eye-to-eye on some stuff but not on all things.  Couldn't get into a debate at SEMA as he was selling and I was decked out in Ford and Meguiar's logo's...  But he was cool to meet!

Other than that, I saw a lot of car-guy friends while there.  Hopefully I can meet more of you next time! :2thumbs:]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>Worked SEMA all week in the Ford booth with the  <a href='http://www.autopia.org/forum/autolink.php?id=1117&amp;script=external&amp;forumid=40\\' target='_blank' class='gal' onmouseover='GAL_popup(this,"1", 0, "style=\"border: 1pt solid #000000;\"", "Meguiars All Purpose Cleaner Plus makes up to 64 gallons of multi-purpose cleaner!<br />
<br><br><a style=\"font-weight: bold\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"http://www.autogeek.net/meguiars-car-care-products.html\">LEARN MORE or BUY NOW!</a>", "style=\"background: #FFFFCC;padding: 2px;font-size: 10px;\"", "Meguiar&#39;s", "style=\"border-top: 1px solid black;border-bottom: 1px solid black;background: #CCCCCC;padding: 1px;font-size: 10px;font-weight: bold;color: #000000;\"");' onmouseout='GAL_hidepopup();'>Meguiar's</a> guys.<br />
As usual, Ford was going OFF all week and it was crazy in there!<br />
<br />
Anyway, I met a few forum guys while I was there, which is always a great thing to do.  <br />
So much better to chat cars and polishing in person whenever possible.<br />
<br />
I met:<br />
<br />
<b>Todd Helme</b> aka <b>TH0001</b>-  Felt like I was seeing an old friend, very nice guy.  A lot of undeserved hype clouds Todd's persona.<br />
<br />
<b>Jack from Proper Auto Care</b>- A man with a LOT of knowledge, and history in the car wax business.<br />
<br />
<b>Greg Nichols of Reflections Detailing of Utah</b>-  Super nice guy, very down to Earth.  Obviously knowledge-packed!<br />
<br />
<b>Robert Whyte</b> aka <b>WhyteWizard</b>- A very friendly guy, struck up a conversation with me in the Ford booth. Chatter, chatter, chatter!!  He has a passion for this stuff.   Stopped by to see him while he manned the HiLustre booth.  We obviously see eye-to-eye on some stuff but not on all things.  Couldn't get into a debate at SEMA as he was selling and I was decked out in Ford and  <a href='http://www.autopia.org/forum/autolink.php?id=1117&amp;script=external&amp;forumid=40\\' target='_blank' class='gal' onmouseover='GAL_popup(this,"1", 0, "style=\"border: 1pt solid #000000;\"", "Meguiars All Purpose Cleaner Plus makes up to 64 gallons of multi-purpose cleaner!<br />
<br><br><a style=\"font-weight: bold\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"http://www.autogeek.net/meguiars-car-care-products.html\">LEARN MORE or BUY NOW!</a>", "style=\"background: #FFFFCC;padding: 2px;font-size: 10px;\"", "Meguiar&#39;s", "style=\"border-top: 1px solid black;border-bottom: 1px solid black;background: #CCCCCC;padding: 1px;font-size: 10px;font-weight: bold;color: #000000;\"");' onmouseout='GAL_hidepopup();'>Meguiar's</a> logo's...  But he was cool to meet!<br />
<br />
Other than that, I saw a lot of car-guy friends while there.  Hopefully I can meet more of you next time! :2thumbs:</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>Kevin Brown</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125168-met-some-forum-guys-sema.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>Chipotl-Away</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125115-chipotl-away.html</link>
			<pubDate>Tue, 10 Nov 2009 03:16:27 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[This is from South Park, so SNWS link (language)

South Park - Chipotle Away &bull; VideoSift: Online Video *Quality Control (http://www.videosift.com/video/South-Park-Chipotle-Away)

Image: http://upshizzle.com/gallery/albums/October_2008/chipotlaway.JPG  (http://upshizzle.com)

Just a heads up if you haven't been watching South Park's new season...it has been first rate stuff. Amazing how they could cram dead celebrities, Chipotle, little kid beauty pageants, pedophilia and planes stuck on the tarmac in 1 single, hilarious episode. :)]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>This is from South Park, so SNWS link (language)<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.videosift.com/video/South-Park-Chipotle-Away" target="_blank">South Park - Chipotle Away &amp;bull; VideoSift: Online Video *Quality Control</a><br />
<br />
<a href="http://upshizzle.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://upshizzle.com/gallery/albums/October_2008/chipotlaway.JPG" border="0" alt="" /></a><br />
<br />
Just a heads up if you haven't been watching South Park's new season...it has been first rate stuff. Amazing how they could cram dead celebrities, Chipotle, little kid beauty pageants, pedophilia and planes stuck on the tarmac in 1 single, hilarious episode. :)</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>Scottwax</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125115-chipotl-away.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>Early Apartment Lease Termination?</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125104-early-apartment-lease-termination.html</link>
			<pubDate>Mon, 09 Nov 2009 21:52:28 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Ok, a buddy of mine ( roomate A) has a apartment in a college town. The apartment is not directly affiliated with the college, but its in the college "zone". He has 2 other roomates (b and c).

Roomate C had a party Saturday night without A and B there. He trashed the place, vomit stains on the carpet, dishes in sink, damage to the apartment etc. Roomate B went in Sunday morning and found roomate C in his room. As roomate B walked by roomate C cocked a pistol and stumbled drunk out of his room, at which point roomate b left the apartment.

Ok, now that the story is clear as mud. lol

Roomate A wants to have his lease terminated early (it runs until next august). His reasoning is that if the guy with the gun gets evicted, he will come back for revenge on the other 2. A just wants to leave. The apartment management company told him it was a police issue not theirs. I say it *IS* their issue (along with Raleigh PD) because the management company CHOSE this guy to be the roomate, and therefore is responsible for everyones safety.

What would be some of my friends options? Can he get out of this lease pretty easy?]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>Ok, a buddy of mine ( roomate A) has a apartment in a college town. The apartment is not directly affiliated with the college, but its in the college &quot;zone&quot;. He has 2 other roomates (b and c).<br />
<br />
Roomate C had a party Saturday night without A and B there. He trashed the place, vomit stains on the carpet, dishes in sink, damage to the apartment etc. Roomate B went in Sunday morning and found roomate C in his room. As roomate B walked by roomate C cocked a pistol and stumbled drunk out of his room, at which point roomate b left the apartment.<br />
<br />
Ok, now that the story is clear as mud. lol<br />
<br />
Roomate A wants to have his lease terminated early (it runs until next august). His reasoning is that if the guy with the gun gets evicted, he will come back for revenge on the other 2. A just wants to leave. The apartment management company told him it was a police issue not theirs. I say it *IS* their issue (along with Raleigh PD) because the management company CHOSE this guy to be the roomate, and therefore is responsible for everyones safety.<br />
<br />
What would be some of my friends options? Can he get out of this lease pretty easy?</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>Brandon1</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125104-early-apartment-lease-termination.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>Cameras you use?</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125083-cameras-you-use.html</link>
			<pubDate>Mon, 09 Nov 2009 02:48:26 GMT</pubDate>
			<description>What type of cameras you guys using when taking pictures of cars? Post some pictures of shots taken with cameras if you want, looking to buy a new set up that has the best, cleanest shot available for under $300 dollars, tell the model and any lenses or other equipment used in taking your pictures.</description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>What type of cameras you guys using when taking pictures of cars? Post some pictures of shots taken with cameras if you want, looking to buy a new set up that has the best, cleanest shot available for under $300 dollars, tell the model and any lenses or other equipment used in taking your pictures.</div>

]]></content:encoded>
			<category domain="http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/">Hot Tub</category>
			<dc:creator>DetailnByDustn</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125083-cameras-you-use.html</guid>
		</item>
		<item>
			<title>Another Economic Stimulus?</title>
			<link>http://www.autopia.org/forum/hot-tub/125054-another-economic-stimulus.html</link>
			<pubDate>Sun, 08 Nov 2009 13:02:34 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Economic Stimulus 

Sometime this year, we taxpayers may again receive an Economic Stimulus payment . This is a very exciting new program. I will explain it using the Q and A format: 

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment? 
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers. 

Q. Where will the government get this money? 
A. From taxpayers. 

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money? 
A. Only a smidgen. 

Q. What is the purpose of this payment? 
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus  stimulating the economy . 

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ? 
A. Shut up. 

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely: 

If you spend the stimulus money at  Wal-Mart , the money will go to China . 
If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs. 
If you purchase a computer, it will go to India .. 
If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico , Honduras, and Guatemala 
If you buy a car, it will go to Japan . 
If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan . 
If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore. 

Instead, keep the money in America by: 

1 spending it at yard sales   
2 going to ball games   
3 spending it on prostitutes 
4 beer  
5 tattoos. 

(These are the only American businesses still operating in the US) 

I'm going to go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that I met at a yard sale and we're going to drink beer all day! :chuckle:]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>Economic Stimulus <br />
<br />
Sometime this year, we taxpayers may again receive an Economic Stimulus payment . This is a very exciting new program. I will explain it using the Q and A format: <br />
<br />
Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment? <br />
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers. <br />
<br />
Q. Where will the government get this money? <br />
A. From taxpayers. <br />
<br />
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money? <br />
A. Only a smidgen. <br />
<br />
Q. What is the purpose of this payment? <br />
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus  stimulating the economy . <br />
<br />
Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ? <br />
A. Shut up. <br />
<br />
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely: <br />
<br />
If you spend the stimulus money at  Wal-Mart , the money will go to China . <br />
If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs. <br />
If you purchase a computer, it will go to India .. <br />
If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico , Honduras, and Guatemala <br />
If you buy a car, it will go to Japan . <br />
If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan . <br />
If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore. <br />
<br />
Instead, keep the money in America by: <br />
<br />
1 spending it at yard sales   <br />
2 going to ball games   <br />
3 spending it on prostitutes <br />
4 beer  <br />
5 tattoos. <br />
<br />
(These are the only American businesses still operating in the US) <br />
<br />
I'm going to go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that I met at a yard sale and we're going to drink beer all day! :chuckle:</div>

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