Are you ready to laugh

[explorer]

I said are you ready to laugh!!!!
Get this , my brother envites me to go to his brother-in-law's house to pick up one of those folding tables, he's having a big event and needed the Explorer and my trailer .
We get there and this guy is conditioning the leather on his car with BABY LOTION , he says it is as good as any conditioner on the marked .

When I got home I asked the wife if I could put Leatherique on my daughter butt she looked at me funny

[Scottwax]

I can top that! I was detailing a Ferrari for a customer of mine at the same time his son was cleaning his own 4 Runner. He was about an hour into cleaning his truck and he came up to me and said "I think I messed up." and I asked what the problem was. He takes me over to his truck and his leather seats have a white haze all over them and that is when I see the bottle of Turtle Wax laying on the front seat along with a towel. He said, "I just waxed my seats. Help." Took me about 10 minutes per seat to clean all that wax off of them. Made some extra money though.

[G35stilez]

LOL! Both very funny.

There are always funny detailing stories. Scottwax has the classic one with the black pickup and the entire jar of turtle wax! LoL.

Me personally, wish I had something to add with that caliber of comedy, but the best I can do is:

My good old roomate who uses a KITCHEN SPONGE and LAUNDRY DETERGENT to wash his car. It's white, so it cant be that noticeable...still something to poke fun at.

I have now told him the basics and I think he has picked up...

[jchetty]

long, but i found it funny,

Hey guys, please help with my mods gone wrong...

Hey guys, I've got a 98 1.8T. I've had a k04 and chip for a while and wanted to get more performance. I was recommended to port and polish the intake and exhaust. We found out they used abrasive material to do it like gritty sand. So I got with my friend that tunes Hondas and we decided to try it ourselves. We got a bag of sandblasting sand and hooked up into the intake and started the car. We had to hold the gas so it would run. He wanted to let the engine suck in the sand through the intake so it would port it out and then push it out the ehxaust so it would port the exhaust manifold.
I was worried that it might cause problems but he figured it'd be OK as long as we didn't make boost and it get sucked in the turbo. After running the car and letting it suck in sand we got about half way through a 25 lb bag. The check engine light was on and the engine was bucking and kicking and sounding really weird. We stopped and hooked the car back up normal and took off the sand supply. We tried to start it again and it was really hard. Once started it couldn't idle and kept making weird noises. We took it out and drove it and it started to make scraping and knocking noises.
Help! Can anyone tell me what to do! My buddy only does Hondas so he doesn't know much about Audis.

[Scottwax]

Please tell me that is a joke....

[BW]

Originally posted by jchetty
long, but i found it funny,

Hey guys, please help with my mods gone wrong...

Hey guys, I've got a 98 1.8T. I've had a k04 and chip for a while and wanted to get more performance. I was recommended to port and polish the intake and exhaust. We found out they used abrasive material to do it like gritty sand. So I got with my friend that tunes Hondas and we decided to try it ourselves. We got a bag of sandblasting sand and hooked up into the intake and started the car. We had to hold the gas so it would run. He wanted to let the engine suck in the sand through the intake so it would port it out and then push it out the ehxaust so it would port the exhaust manifold.
I was worried that it might cause problems but he figured it'd be OK as long as we didn't make boost and it get sucked in the turbo. After running the car and letting it suck in sand we got about half way through a 25 lb bag. The check engine light was on and the engine was bucking and kicking and sounding really weird. We stopped and hooked the car back up normal and took off the sand supply. We tried to start it again and it was really hard. Once started it couldn't idle and kept making weird noises. We took it out and drove it and it started to make scraping and knocking noises.
Help! Can anyone tell me what to do! My buddy only does Hondas so he doesn't know much about Audis.

LOL LOL LOL LOL! NOW THAT'S FUNNY!

[rusty bumper]

Read this: http://www.themotoroilsite.com/forum...ST&f=58&t=281&
(I wonder if they use a Pine-Sol wash?)

[Dale DeSteno]

Originally posted by Scottwax
Please tell me that is a joke....

No doubt! I almost started crying!!!!!!

[Brad B.]

Originally posted by Dale DeSteno
No doubt! I almost started crying!!!!!!

That old tale has been circulating for months. Just keeps popping up over and over....by different people.

When will it ever die?

[BK1]

I've heard that one also...its pretty old.

[jchetty]

about that audi story, i hope its a joke. its from another site i used to frequent, stangnet.i dont know whether or not it is true but i do know ppl who are that stupid, for example why would someone fix stuff knowing they are not good at it. well this is a true story, we had carpet put into our house. one of the bedroom doors didnt close properly, so my dad decided to modify it. in a few seconds u will see why i call him **the engineer**. so he cuts a sizable chunk from the door. he calls me to brag about what he has done, and asks for help hanging the door. in all his glory he says "see what a little cut wit the circulaw saw can do." well **the engineer** trys to close the door, of course the door still doesnt close, he couldnt figure why. of course by this time im on the floor crying he cut the top of the door not the bottom



ps this is a tru story, i decided not to put up a new door.....by now i thought it wouldnt be as funny----still brings me to tears

[Intermezzo]

That story about what NY Detailer did to his old frat buddy on the freeway still cracks me up every time I think about it.